Who Hair and Gingerbread Men

Hallelujah, Christmas break has officially begun. This family is so in need of some schedule-free down time. Riley had her last pre-school day on Wednesday and Caeley had her last day of school today. The 7th grade ends the first semester of school with a celebration and they do something called Who Hair (like as in the Whos in Whoville) which is best described with a photo--



Too fun! Then we decorated gingerbread men...always a good thing. We all enjoyed eating them - for the most part. Caeley ate her whole cookie, Corban picked off the M&Ms and ate one leg and Riley freaked out because icing got on her fingers. She's still working on hers. Mine is half gone and will be finished off before the night is out, I'm sure.




I love this time of year and am so thankful for a break, because, honestly, I'm done - stick a fork in me. I'm ready to refresh, spend some time with the family and restructure and reevaluate during the January fast. I need to hear from God about what my next few months should look like and how I can streamline my routine. I'm way out of whack somewhere.

But for now...it's time to chill...TYJ!

Restoration

I am processing through something I heard this weekend at the LIFE retreat. Tricia Gunn referred to the passage in Luke 7 (it's in other places, too), where the "sinful woman" anoints Jesus. She breaks open a very expensive - like a years' wages expensive - jar of perfume and washes His feet with it. What Tricia said about this has stuck in my mind - she said "the money she earned to buy this perfume, she earned lying on her back." And then she basically said that every time she gave herself to a man she gave away a piece of herself, but when she poured out what she had on Jesus, she was restored. He knew what she was and He knew how she got that perfume, but He did not turn her away or turn from her. In fact, He holds her up as an example and says that everywhere the gospel is preached, her story would also be told.

I have found it to be true that the very things I have done in my past that have caused me shame are also the things that, when brought to light and brought before the throne of God, have given me a greater sense of love and acceptance. As long as we try to hide ourselves from God and cover our shame, it is as though we have made camp in a garbage dump. We sit huddled with the mess we've found ourselves in. The only way to be free of something is to give it to someone else. It's like the clutter I am constantly battling to be rid of - I can hang onto it, or I can give it to Goodwill. Even better I can give it to the garbage collectors. But a decision has to be made...hello, it's GARBAGE!

And the same goes for the junk in our soul (mind and emotions). If we want to be rid of guilt and shame or anger or whatever garbage we live with every day, we have to give it to someone else...and that someone isn't your spouse or kids because they can't handle your junk, either. God the Father is the one who stands ready, and really He has already taken it. Once you have chosen to belong to Him - and it is a choice and anyone can make that choice - the only power the past has over you is the power you give it.

Several months ago God showed me that I had been hiding from Him. Even though I knew in my mind that I was forgiven, I still felt a "yuck" that I couldn't shake and so I tried to hide, as though one could hide from Him. It not only blocked that relationship, but it was blocking other relationships - with Dave, with friends, etc. And that was the power my past had over me. I gave it the power to keep me in shame, until, in a moment of time, God put His finger on it and said, "That's not who you are. I have given you a new name." I had to bring it to Him, be honest about what I had done, about who I had been, and let Him speak the truth to me. It was life-changing. You can do that, too...and you don't have to sit in the dumpster as long as I did.

The cool thing is that what I feared - being exposed - was exactly what I needed to be free. And it is what He has used to make me a better servant to people. It drives me to love others. It moves me with compassion. Last night I saw "The Voyage of the Dawn Treader." Without too much background, because this post is long enough already, a boy named Eustace (how horrible for him) had been turned into a dragon. It happened because he gave in to a temptation, even though he had been warned that temptation was coming...he was weak and so he gave in. There was nothing he could do on his own to change.

In that disappointing state, feeling stuck and feeling sorrow for where he ended up, his destiny to do extraordinary things had not changed. In fact it was exactly because of what he had done, and because he was a dragon that could fly, that he was able to be in a position to be the hero in the story and be used to put all things right. Did that mean what he did was okay? No. Why, then? Because he came to a place of repentance (he turned away from sin toward God). When he met Aslan face to face, suffering the consequences of his sin, he was "healed." In the movie Aslan drew in the sand with His paw and roared a giant lion roar. The scales were blown off and Eustace became a boy again. He became what he always was...the boy that was inside the dragon, but couldn't get free on his own.

My mind instantly went to the story in the gospels of the woman caught in an adulterous situation. Bottom line, Jesus drew in the sand and said he who is without sin can cast the first stone. No one hung around to condemn her, and He said, "I don't condemn you either, go and sin no more." That's what happened to Eustace. He was confronted with the savior, in his sin...he was caught red-handed, so to speak...no hiding it...and was healed and restored. And his destiny had not changed. He could still be great in the kingdom.

God can build off of your past, whatever it is, whether it's things you did or things other people did to you. You can't change the past, but He can make your foundation strong, building on those things, IF you bring it all to Him. He starts where you are, not where you "should" be. He can take garbage and make it treasure, but we have to choose that. Choose it. Please. There is nothing like being seen for who you really are and knowing that you are loved and cherished.

Christmas...Who's Birthday Is It Again?

Christmas is coming and we are always trying to be sure we keep the focus on the reason we have this holiday (aka, Holy Day) in the first place. It's such a challenge...what do we do with Santa Claus, how much stuff do we give them, yada yada. I was praying the other day and it just hit me that it's Jesus' birthday, or at least that's when we celebrate it...who knows the actual day (well, God does:) But anyway, we just celebrated Christopher's birthday and what did we do? We ate cake and bought him gifts. What do you give the King of Kings for His birthday? Well let's ask Him.


“When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, he will sit on his glorious throne. All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate the people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. He will put the sheep on his right and the goats on his left.

“Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’

“Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’

“The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’ -- Matthew 25:31-40

We can give to Him by giving to others...amazing! And of course I remember again what the lady at Walmart said - "I am convinced that every time I do a kindness for someone, I increase His glory." To glorify Him in this sense means simply to give an accurate representation of who He is. And He is so very kind...therefore, we should be kind...at Christmas and at all times. Can you even believe He lets us be His glory bearers? If I were Him I think I would just do it myself...but not Him. He believes we can do it and He enables us to do so.

So I am going to be looking for ways to be kind and generous this Christmas. And you better know we'll be having some birthday cake on Christmas day, too...it IS a birthday party!!

Going Home

I'm on a Sara Groves kick....again :) I LOVE her music, her lyrics. This is "Going Home" --

I’ve been feeling kind of restless
I’ve been feeling out of place
I can hear a distant singing
A song that I can’t write
And it echoes of what I’m always trying to say

There’s a feeling I can’t capture
It’s always just a prayer away
I want to know the ending
Things hoped for but not seen
But I guess that’s the point of hoping anyway

Of going home, I’ll meet you at the table
Going home, I’ll meet you in the air
And you are never too young to think about it
Oh, I cannot wait to be home

I’m confined by my senses
To really know what you are like
You are more than I can fathom
And more than I can guess
And more than I can see with human sight

But I have felt you with my spirit
I have felt you fill this room
And this is just an invitation
Just a sample of the whole
And I cannot wait to be going home

Going home, I’ll meet you at the table
Going home, I’ll meet you in the air
And you are never too young to think about it
Oh, I cannot wait to be going, to be going home

Face to face, how can it be
Face to face, how can it be
Face to face, how can it be

Cuz this is just an invitation
Just a sample of the whole
And I cannot wait to be going home

New Perspective

Yesterday I ran out to pick up a pizza and took Christopher with me. I wasn't feeling all that great, mentally/emotionally. While I was out I ran into Walmart (not my favorite place to be on a Friday afternoon) because we were almost out of milk. I thought it would give me chance to look at booster seats for Riley, too, otherwise I probably would not have set foot in that place.

I walked to the back and looked at seats and didn't really see anything I liked. I started walking toward the milk and thought "well I don't know why I came in here...waste of time." About that time an elderly woman approached. She was walking slowly with one of those walkers with a basket on the front and she took notice of Christopher. He was smiling big as he usually does and she looked like she wanted to stop to interact with him, so I stopped. That happens sometimes when I'm with him...I'm used to it.

She said,"Look at that big smile. Are you going to go to Auburn one day?" I just said, "maybe so." I could see that her eyes were cloudy with cataracts. Then she asked me if I had signed him for a PAC college savings plan. I thought that was a little strange...kind of random. I said that our other kids had savings plans (really only Caeley does) but that we would set him up with one eventually. She said "well sometimes people forget about that or don't even know about it. I just wanted to make sure you knew."

I said thank you and we both started to walk our own ways. Then she stopped and said something I didn't understand, so I backed up and asked her to repeat.

She said,

"I am convinced that every time I do a kindness for someone, I increase His glory." 

She looked at me like she knew I would understand what she meant (I think there are lots of people who wouldn't get that and wouldn't know who the "Him" was). Once it sunk in what she said, I responded, "Oh absolutely...I completely agree."

She smiled and turned around and walked off. I headed to get the milk thinking that whole thing was really random. But I couldn't stop thinking about what she said and I noticed I felt much lighter than when I got there. I decided to go look for her - I didn't know what I would say if I found her - but she was nowhere to be found. I was like, God was she an angel or what - she couldn't move that fast with a walker ;)

Anyway, I got in the car, went to get the pizza, still thinking about what she said. I got in the car and turned the ipod on and Mighty to Save was on - "everyone needs compassion, the kindness of a savior." I started crying and cried all the way home. I'm still not sure why or what happened but I felt like the encounter was a defining moment and a real shift in perspective for me in some way. Something "clicked" inside me through all of it.

 I really don't know how to explain it and it probably sounds like such a benign encounter...guess you had to be there :)

The kindness of the Lord leads to repentance - Romans 2

Just an update...

It's been a busy month at the Pittman house. My colonoscopy came back normal...woohoo! My doctor put me on a gluten free diet for a few weeks, and I am not so much gluten free, but I am gluten lower :) I can't tell if it's helping but we'll see what he says in a couple of weeks when I go back. We have had both the stomach bug and strep throat over the last couple of weeks. And we celebrated Christopher's first birthday. He LOVED his cake and was covered in blue icing...it was so great!

Prayer request...

The weather has finally turned cold...YES!!! I am sitting here enjoying a hot mug of...chicken broth. That's not the way I want to finish that sentence. I would love to say coffee, hot chocolate, mocha or even chicken soup (like with other stuff in it, too). Most of us are recovering from a stomach virus...but by now I could probably eat some real food. I know I could eat some real food. The reason I am drinking broth is that I am on a liquid diet today in preparation for a colonoscopy tomorrow. I am so excited about it, too......not. I haven't been feeling all that great off and on for a while and have lost some weight without really exercising or changing my diet...so, due to our family history I get to have this fun procedure about 15 years premature. More than likely I have irritable bowel syndrome, but it's just wise to rule out other things before making that assumption. While I am not looking forward to it, I am also not afraid or nervous about it (at least not now). Maybe in the morning as the time approaches I might feel some apprehension...after all it's just not a natural thing to go through. Thankfully I will not be aware of what's happening. But what I do know is that whatever happens will serve me...in other words I am confident that it will draw me closer to God, and I will not bend or bow my faith or my heart to my circumstances. I don't serve my circumstances, but rather, my circumstances are servants to the Lord, who is sovereign over all things...including my little individual life. Having said that I still value your prayers, so if you are so inclined, please pray for me. Thank you!!!